I was looking at Ryan's youtube account today. Watching the very first videos of Riley...I can't believe how tiny she was!! I am sooo thankful for those videos as I really don't remember much about that time with all the sleep loss and changes and newness of every thing. It's funny watching those videos I now know that little person on the screen so well. I know exactly what she was trying to tell us in the videos, it was all such a mystery to me her tiny cues and what she needed. Now looking back I hear that tiny itty bitty voice, and see that tongue go out and I know she was asking her Daddy to give her to me to feed her.
I am so looking forward to the next baby. I am definitely not ready for another one, but I am looking forward to the fact that I'll know what newborns are like. The next one will have their own set of cues and needs (and hopefully at least one of our babies will be a better sleeper or I'll be looking mighty old by the time I'm 30!)... Even with the newness of all babies, the mystery of newborns won't be so strange to me, and hopefully less overwhelming.
I read some where that the first 6 weeks of any babies life is hard there is no way around it. There are so many adjustments and changes and new roles for every person in the family. But next time around I'll know how quickly those first 3 months fly by and not be in such a rush to "get through it". I keep reminding myself of that now, especially on the nights (and we've had many) when Riley's up crying every 20 minutes (no exaggeration) becuase some thing is bothering her (I'm really into italics in this post!)
Anyway here are the videos that are just getting me...I can't believe how swollen I was the first time I held her..I guess that's generally normal after labor as the body produces extra to keep you safe in the case of blood loss (and also all the fluids they pumped into me before, during, and after surgery didn't help). I'm happy to say I've lost 35lbs since this video was shot :0P and am 15lbs below my pre-preggo weight (which isn't saying much but hey!)
Man these videos make me sad...And happy! I'm so glad we have them!
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